June was an exciting month news wise! There were huge victories in the LGBTQ community, both at the beginning of the month and then again at the end of the month.
It began with the unveiling of the Caitlyn Jenner Vanity Fair cover, which was seen by many as a major triumph for the Transgender community. Others saw it in a less pleasant light. I fell somewhere in the middle, and struggled to explain why. Unfortunately, when I look back at the top posts (which as always I’ll share at the end of this post), I see that my first flawed attempt to explain my feelings on the issue made my top 5 list, but my much more eloquent (and accurate) explanation that I posted a few days later didn’t even make the top 10…
I want to take this opportunity to ask you to check out my perfected explanation of my views on the Caitlyn Jenner debut. Even if you don’t care about trans rights, I include my opinion of labels, which I think is one of the main issues with our country and the cause of a lot of our civil rights issues. And I don’t think I’m alone in my view… There’s a great quote by Morgan Freeman that shows that labels are part of the cause for racism.
It is my opinion that if we continue labeling each other, we’ll never see each other as just people. And if we can’t see each other as simply people, there will always be the prejudices that keep us from treating each other as equals. Whether it’s racial prejudice or the religious based prejudices that have plagued the LGBTQ community.
But, we as a species are making huge strides in our morality! By the end of June, the bias that has kept same sex marriages from being legal across the country was finally overturned! At the end of the month, the Supreme Court (or SCOTUS, as the character conscious media and Twitter folk have dubbed it) ruled that banning same sex marriage was unconstitutional.
Which, of course, it is! You can’t ban someone from a basic human right, even if your religion doesn’t approve of it. We have freedom of religion in this country, and as many have said before, marriage isn’t really a religious issue anyway. You can get married no matter what your religion, even if you don’t have one. Thus, even if the majority of the country believed same sex marriage is a sin (which I don’t think the majority of people believe that), it has no bearing on whether or not same sex marriage should be legal. And thankfully, the Supreme Court agreed!
It’s exciting to see our country change towards a future where people are simply people, and not treated differently based on superficial labels!
As a side note, the Huffington Post has a really interesting article that presents evidence that “traditional marriage” is a fairly new concept, and not as sacred as the religious bigots would have you believe.
Or there’s always Betty Bowers, “America’s Best Christian…”
Warning, this is very likely to offend some of you. Even though she’s quoting the Bible, her points are a little shocking.
Meanwhile, my personal life was a lot less exciting, though not without it’s own bit of controversy. Especially in the men department (no surprise there).
Early in the month, I was struggling with my depression and with the loss of a friend, that I didn’t think needed to happen. He was a friend whom had always been kind of a fair weather friend anyway, if I’m honest with myself, but I’d thought he was more than that. Not in a romantic sense, mind you, just that we were closer than that.
Then again, most of our mutual friends realize how self-centered he is and that he’s not really aware of how his words and actions affect those around him, especially the people he supposedly views as his friends. Those of us that have left the tiny little town where he lives have been all but forgotten. He doesn’t even reach out unless he feels like there is something in it for him.
I think I knew the end of our friendship was coming, I just didn’t expect him to zing me with allegations of being rude and purposefully hurtful to him.
Plus, it was hard to take because I’ve been dealing with my fear about my job for a while now… my feelings of being an impostor have just been truly discovered and dealt with this very month. And then, not until almost the end of the month!
In other menfolk news, there was Mr. West Coast, whom I was intrigued by, and continued talking to longer than I should have because he struck me as a really intelligent man and a worthy debate partner. His view of women was so offensive that it begged to be confronted, yet when I attempted to engage in an honest, open discussion, attempting to argue my point, he suggested that I was just an emotional, irrational, bellicose female, laughing at my point of view, and not even honoring it with a counter-argument.
I enjoy a good debate, but his manner of talking to me was plain rude… and a tad bit scary! It made me think that he may have some underlying abusive tendencies that I should steer clear of, and after several attempts to politely ask him to stop contacting me, I finally had to resort to posting his words to show him how offensive they were.
Whether he ever recognized the inappropriateness of his actions or not, I don’t know. But he did stop contacting me.
I call that a win!
Then there’s the Boy.
We’re still friends, although I was pretty sure we were done… again.
It may be that while he understands me fairly well, I still don’t understand him, which is very hard for me since I tend to read people very well. It’s one of the things that makes me successful as a teacher. I read the kids well enough to help them to trust me and listen to me… usually. The last two years, I’ve felt like it’s been kind of hit or miss.
But with the Boy, the things that I think I see, he inevitably tells me I’m wrong. Almost every time. And he won’t let me see his feelings at all, making it difficult for me to understand any of his motivations. Without an understanding of his motivations, I will never be able to accurately read him. It makes me completely dependent on his words, which he uses very frugally.
It leads to me being frustrated, but he’s one of a very small number of constants in my life. Thus, the inconsistency of his communication (because of his own issues he’s dealing with) makes it even more difficult to read him and confuses me.
I’d be better off if I were to figure out how to just walk away, at least while he figures things out…
But I need him. I need his advice, and the comfort he provides, when he can.
Which brings us to now.
Right now, I’m at my parents’ house (been here for a week or two), and that usually comes with some stress.
Not that my parents intentionally stress me out, but just being in a space that isn’t my space, with foods that aren’t foods I’d buy, and the time constraints that come with living in a house with 8 indoor dogs that like to bark every time the door opens or a car drives up, can be stressful. I need an occasional ear to vent to, one that makes me feel calm. And for some reason, talking to or being near the Boy calms me.
I really wish I could explain it, because if I knew why, I might be able to find another way to recreate that feeling, other than being a bother to him.
But I’m getting away from the purpose of this post. It seems that my movie reviews are again at the top of the heap! See for yourself. Here are the most viewed posts (and the most interested countries) of June 2015:
Top 5 posts of June:
Top 3 countries that read my blog: